A regret is a negative emotional state, a negative feeling for things we done or things we didn’t do in the past.
Have no regrets, is a popular saying, but can we really live with no regrets. I don’t think so. Everyone out there have some regrets at some point in life.
You might said something and that hurt someone you love. You regret it when you calm and thoughtful. You wish you didn’t say it. You blame yourself.
Regrets can occur in different parts of life.
So if you moved to another country for whatever reason, but you left past your kids, and life took a new direction you might have some regret. You find yourself thinking and blaming your past decision….
Or if you had a chance to start a great job but you didn’t take it as it was away from where you lived with your family, maybe you feel a deep regret.
Or might you had a child just to please your partner and soon after that things got really tough between you. There is a chance you regret what you did.
1. Understand the regret.
Whatever is your regret it brings the feelings of shame, anger, sadness, loss, remorse. All these feeling leads to stress and anxiety.
It’s important we understand the feeling of regret. It happened. It can’t be undone.
First step to deal with it is open your heart and tell your mind that: at that time you really did your best you could do. You thought it was the best choice to make.
2. Learn the lesson.
The regret takes our attention. It disconnects us from the present moment in time.
Right your story in a journal. Everything as it happened. Take a look from a prespective of learning from it. What did you learn about yourself. What is the lesson to be taken in? What did you learn about someone else, if there was somebody else involved. From every situation that went wrong there is a big lesson to be learned. It’s an new opportunity to take that lesson as it would serve us well in the future days.
3. Take some action.
Regret is a painful experience but also it can be a helpful emotion too when we learn something from it.
We need to apply these corrective ways to life. I am talking about the lessons we learned from a certain regret.
Sometimes life give us a similar choice to make and surely this time you going to get it right.
Or if there something to correct within yourself take notice that it wont happen again.
4. Time to forgive and let go.
This is where we get stuck in a regret. We can’t forgive ourself.
Guess what, now is time to forgive. If you ask me how? I would say: I have had many regrets in life. Manytimes I wish I did things in a different way. I wish I’d made a better choices….. But I am going to tell you that all the regrets lead us somewhere and that somewhere is right here, right now. All these regrets transform us to become the people whom we are today.
So is that time when we forgive ourself and let go of these regrets. In many ways they help to improve the quality of life and change the way we think.
5. Move forward.
Time to move on. Stop turning your head back. It’s over and done.
Live in the moment and take life as it comes. Notice. Learn. Apply. Forgive. Move on.
Tomorrow is a new day. Grab it and don’t waste it thinking of the past.
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