Anger is a normal healthy human emotion. We all experience anger in some forms. It’s considered a responce to insult, frustration, unjustice, attack. When we get angry adrenaline rush in our body preparing us for fight, giving you energy and that tense feeling. If anger gets out of control can lead to many issues, at work, with personal relationships and affecting the quality of life.
Being angry is not a problem. The way we express it, whether we express it or not, can lead to problems. We get angry in a heat of a moment. For example if we’re driving in traffic and someone cuts the corner and get in front of you is very likely you get angry and beep the horn at them. So in this case you expressed the anger by beeping the horn which is not a problem. In anger we might say things that we regret later. Or if you suppress the feeling of anger it might lead to problems in long term. Not expressing your anger can cause behaviour problems. You might find yourself getting angry to often and to quickly. Anger out of control can conduct health issues, as stress, depression, anxiety, and heart problems and rise of blood pressure.
Keeping anger under control can be challenging but managable if you follow them steps:
1. Get out of situation.
If you think the anger is controlling you try and get out of the situation. Start counting from one to ten and take some deep breaths. In and longer out. In and longer out. It usually works. Afterwards you might express your anger without getting aggressive.
2. Think before you speak.
In anger it’s likely we say something that we really regret soon after. So pause, and think. Collect your thoughts and let others do the same.
3. Express your anger.
Once you calm yourself down express your concerns and furstration in assertive way but without hurting or controlling anyone else. Control the tone of your voice. Shouting don’t help.
4. Physical activities make it easier.
Exercise does help reduce the stress level. It also make it easier to control your anger. So if you feeling stressed go for a run, or just do some other exercise that you like.
5. Identify stressful situations.
Identifying stressful situations can make you prepare to avoid them if possible. For example if you getting angry at traffic rush hour try to travel earlier or maybe a bit later. Or if you getting angry when you shopping at busy times, just shop when it’s quiet. If there some people that triggering your anger stay away from them.
6. Take little breaks.
Give yourself some time out every so often espesially if you experiencing stress. Short breaks will help you deal with situations calmly.
7. Be creative to control your emotions.
Use your passions and creativity to get on top of your emotions. Writing, painting, singing, dancing can help reduce the anger.
8. Check the way you think.
Negative thoughts make anger worse. Try to avoid thoughts like: “you never do anything to help”, or “you make matters worse”, “you never listen to me”, “you always late”, “life is not fair”. Them thoughts only push you further way in anger. For example instead of saying “you never listen to me” say: “please let me talk” Let go of unhelpful thoughts.
9. Look after yourself.
If you have a healthy life style is more likely you can keep anger under control. Drugs and alcohol make the emotion of anger to escalate. Relax daily and have enough sleep regularly.
10. Talk it out.
Talking to someone you feel close to also can help with anger. You get to look at situation from a different point of view.
11. Seek professional help.
If you think you can’t control your anger ask for professional help. See your doctor, they will refer you to anger management courses or to counselling.